infomodder | IC contact [Mask or Menace]

[She can lure all she wants, persuasive, a pretty sort of plain in the eyes in the others, absolutely gorgeous in the eyes of three fathers, though two with skewed ideas of love and beauty. He imagines Hobbs kept her close, doesn't know the extent of how close Lecter kept her, but Will isn't afraid of letting go, not like this. Experience can't be fully gotten when someone stays under the same umbrella all throughout life, when one has to trust instead of learn.

He made his own mistakes as a young person, including what could be seen as running away. Who is he to take away that joy from Abigail Hobbs, the joy of being young? Or trying to be. To figure it out in a different world.]

Needs to be cut monthly, at the rate it's growing now.

[Which means three weeks, roughly. He'll give her three weeks out on her own if she's so intent.

She's not in his hair like lice. She's in his hair and he damn well likes it. She can come back and cut it again, take away strength and renew it at the same time. Or she can just come back. That's fine, too.]

I'm sure Freddie knows a good hair salon.

[ bc curls. mostly abigail just doesn't want to indicate she'll come back when, right now, she really doesn't want to. ]

[That's good and all, really, but she needs to understand that no matter how off the tracks she tries to go, if she doesn't check in, if she doesn't pop back up...Will's going to initiate contact. And if that goes ignored, bloodhound's gonna do what a bloodhound does best.]

I'm glad for Freddie. Doesn't pertain to me outside of that.

It might if I decide I like the town I grew up in is better than Heropa. At least there are four seasons in Bloomington.

[ or... summer, pre-winter, winter, second winter, elevensies, luncheon, surprise winter and then "summer" again. ]

[But not a city that would get her the best of the best. So...okay to run away to, not to live in. What if it's not even there?]

If I ask what flipped this switch, am I gonna get a raspberry?

[ SHE HAS COORDINATES. SHE WILL FIND A REPLACEMENT BLOOMINGTON. ]

No. I only do that when its stuff about home.

[Will Graham, keenest bloodhound that ever ran with Jack Crawford's pack, is an observant individual. Since coming here, he's had more of a chance to observe the modern teenager. He can attempt to communicate like one better now.

Behold:]

??? ??? ?

Jayden kissed me.

[This reply takes a few minutes. Because his initial reaction isn't quite so. Well.

Balanced.]

Had he just eaten a bunch of onions or garlic bread? That has to be a horrible kiss for your next move to be getting the hell out of any city with imPorts and back to Minnesota.

[Too much tongue...?????? How does one person fuck up a kiss this badly, he does not know.]

No!

Shut up, it wasn't bad. It was nice.

You are not allowed to go Uncle Buck on him.

They probably have imPorts in Minnesota, too.

ImPorts aren't what I'm getting away from, that makes me sound racist. I just want to get away from people.

In general.

[Shut up? WOW. That is like saying, "I want to get away from people, but you should take my other ear first because I'm rude." Abiveal for dinner, that's all she wrote.]

You are allowed to enjoy nice things. You don't have to run away from something that's nice because of some sort of self-imposed guilt about not deserving anything good, acting along the lines that if it stumbles along you have to immediately get rid of it in the most extreme way possible. This is a very extreme reaction. This is a hyperactive reaction, no matter how much time you've put into looking at costs.

[Which doesn't mean he won't give her ticket money, but now that things are getting clearer (or so he thought), this is...not what he expected, like, at all.]

[ sass comes with adopting a teenager. brought this on to yourself, sir. ]

It is not extreme. And it's not self-imposed guilt.

[ it is, a little bit. because of stiles. but explaining that means she would have to, you know, tell will that he is gone and abigail doesn't want to talk about it so she just chucks that context out the window. ]

Nevermind.

[THE ADOPTION WASN'T HIS CHOICE HIS LIFE IS SO HARD]

Running back to the state where your father murdered girls who looked like you and then murdered your mother and then tried to murder you and the Chesapeake Ripper cut off your ear because you're upset about something you just, yourself, described as nice is not an extreme reaction and has nothing to do with guilt.

[Sometimes people are force fed ears. Sometimes they are force fed their own words. One is preferable to the other, isn't it? And at least Will is not the dad who would take to Jayden in the same way Abigail took to the young, deceased Mister Boyle.]

What am I not supposed to be minding here?

That's not

Why.

You're being a jerk.

Then tell me the full thing if it's not just because you and Chia Pet had a kiss.

[So he can, perhaps, be a jerk more accurately. Everyone wants that. It's what they pay him for.

Well, not really. But he gets away with it. Along with murder, in some ways. Throw him a freaking bone, Abigail.]

Apparently he never noticed my deformity until he was up close and personal with it.

It didn't go well.

Because Jayden is normal and reacts normally when fucked up shit is right in his face.

[ oh swears. look how phenomenally upset she is, she can't figure out another way to explain that isn't laced with profanity. but she also doesn't blame jayden for reacting. she just hates that she let herself get caught off guard and she really hates that she cared enough that it hurt, tremendously ashamed of her own perceived stupidity. karma sure knew how to hit where it hurt. ]

I was stupid enough to think it stopped mattering. That pretty girls don't actually have to worry about ears.

I don't want to be near people because people look at me like I'm a freak. Or purposely avoid looking at my scars like they can pretend I'm not grotesque.

Like they can pretend I'm whole.

[Oh no, swearing. He's never heard those words.]

Your not having an ear is not fucked up shit, Abigail. How you came to be missing it is the part that is fucked up shit.

[There is a difference between someone who was born without or had to give up an ear, an arm, legs, whatever else due to accident or disease and someone had had it taken from them. He hasn't taken the time to focus on the wound, but he saw the ear loud and clear. He knows it was cut off. He knows that if someone got close enough, they'd be able to tell that it wasn't, well. Congenital or gotten rid of due to real need. Where's Miriam Lass when you need her.

(Will doesn't know but THERE WAS NEVER A BODY and that arm was fresh stop being so bullheaded Jack)]

Just because someone looks at you like a freak doesn't mean you are a freak. What people look at you as doesn't reflect who you are. In fact, it does a damn good job at reflecting them as much as you might think it reflects you. And if your desire here is to get away from people on the whole, just under $500 isn't going to help you do that. You want to get away for a while, fine. Have a vacation, okay. But you're going to have to come back to society at some point, and if you're not using that vacation to help develop coping skills and mechanisms, this is never going to get any better. You can make it a goal to repeat a vicious cycle and grow stagnant during it as much as you want. But I'm going to shoot that down every time.

[Maybe he doesn't say "no" as much as he should, but he'll strive to make sure that he says what needs to be said in the place of it. Lecter might be better at coddling and cooing than Will is, but...Will is also not going to slaughter Abigail and anyone she has attachments to because he's a maliciously curious fucktruck who never learned how to share in the sandbox.

They're different levels of jerk, okay.]

You don't even look at it, Will.

[ SHE NOTICES THIS SHIT OKAY. she can't help it. ]

It doesn't matter.

Jayden freaked out, justifiably, and all I could see was Nicholas Boyle.

I want to go home because I don't feel safe around people right now and Blomington has a heck of a lot less.

I just want to be alone and I can't be alone here.

I don't have to look at it all the time to know what it looks like.

[His memory's good when it's not being manipulated. And the last part of Abigail Hobbs he saw was that ear, why would he go out of his way to focus on the spot where it was when he can focus on, oh, everything else? On her pale eyes, on the way her hair falls around her face, on the fact of the matter that her chest rises and falls because she's breathing, because she's alive. He notices that she favors the scarf he gave her, of course, but it's not the focal point.

She is.]

You're not going home because your home isn't here. Neither is mine. Or Freddie's. Or Jayden's or anyone else's. But if you feel so unsafe around everyone that you're thinking of Nicholas Boyle and your immediate decision is to throw yourself into the place you grew up that's not what you know and you'll have to deal with complete strangers? I'm going to have to close my wallet off to that one. You're registered. You can use the same traveling advancements I do. Why not take a day or two off at Maurtia Falls? I've heard nothing but that it's discreet. You can be alone there. I'll fund something like that.

[She can discreetly kill ppl.]

I don't want discretion! What does that even mean!

I don't have a home anymore. If I go back, I die.

Whatever. I'll send you a post card.

[ bye felicia. ]

Edited 2014-10-31 20:50 (UTC)

You don't want discretion. You want me to go along with this like it's not absolute bullshit and a terrible idea and now that I'm not, you're throwing your death in my face.

[Everyone is a jerk, the show.]

I didn't realize you thought I was a doormat.

I'm not throwing it in your face! But every time someone says this isn't home it's because they're thinking of what they can go back to and I can't. I have nothing there. I had nothing there.

This is all I have.

So you think I'm running away and I am, but not the way that you think.

I'm not running away to something familiar.

THIS is my home now and I can't contextualize Minnesota as anything but my home until I see that it's not. But it's still the last place I saw my mom or Marissa and I miss them. I need them and this is as close as I can get anymore.

You're not a doormat. If I wanted a doormat, I would have asked Hannibal.

[ oh. snap. but lbr he was always pro-bringing abigail home. ]

I just thought

You'd get it.

But no one does.

And that's okay.

Don't be mad at Jayden, it's not his fault.

Bye.

[God. God. Why isn't he real dad, you are not too old to go over my knee. Real dad privileges!]

You're being stupid.

[SHE SAID HE COULD SAY IT ALANA WOULD APPROVE. No she wouldn't. It is a last ditch effort and very little effort has gone into it, or so it seems. He actually wrote out fifteen other things first and finally gave up. How to get a teenager's attention other than fall down to that level????? Jesus Christ. He actually doesn't think this is stupid but he also realizes that the more he tries to explain anything the more he's probably going to get shut down further because Abigail is upset and not thinking clearly and continually proving it.

Especially with the Hannibal shout-out.

If she dares to go off the grid for too long, Will is not at all afraid to call in a few favors and drag her kicking and screaming out of her hermit cave.]

[ radio silence.

because she's being over emotional and stupid.

but don't worry... ]

[ a few days later, the day before halloween, she texts back.

surprise??? ]

I'm back.

[ siren call of her crush on stiles combined with never ending self-loathing because ofc she'll come home to hang out with stiles even though he has a girlfriend apparently so abigail is shit out of luck. ]

It's a cemetery from my house to Marissa's.

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

1/2

no subject