IC contact [Mask or Menace]

[infomodder]

"Gone fishing."

[ so don't leave messages to ruin the after fishing glow !!!

your one stop shop for not leaving him alone ]

Comments

text - Monday, 6/22

[runningstart]

these old ladies are so upset that ur not doing the deliveries

[runningstart]

im too young apparently way too young to oogle

[runningstart]

u did that on purpose didnt u

ya bastard

10 min later

[runningstart]

omg no janice i am not passing on ur regards dont kiss me i am not gonna kiss will 4 u

[runningstart]

I GOT CANDY its those strawberry ones with the gummy insides yesssssss

20 min later

[runningstart]

JANICE ORDERED TWO????? i shouldve looked thru the whole list before i started dangit

[runningstart]

janice pls

[runningstart]

janICE PLS

45 min later

[runningstart]

i feel bad 4 janice shes lonely u should probably give her a pity fling make her day

[infomodder]

janice insists i look like her dead husband and calls me by his name all the time
"oh gracious im so sorry will you just look so much like ernie its like hes come back from the dead!"
always touching my arms
asking if i can mow her lawn
clip her rose bushes
i didnt think shed go this far
please dont kiss me
ill match their strawberry candy donation if you dont kiss me

[runningstart]

i dont need a bribe 2 not kiss u but im gonna take it anyway

janice wants u to mow her lawn in short shorts

[infomodder]

youre such a noble young man

did she tell you that
im gonna have a talk with janice about this
its unaccpetable

[runningstart]

no she didnt say it im just very perceptive

also impressionable

u sent me into a den of cougars

[infomodder]

theyre not quick enough to be cougars
more like domesticated cats
and i assume their lemonade and cookies are better than what any cougar could make

[infomodder]

lets keep this between us yeah?
its embarrassing enough as is

[runningstart]

awwwww

ok fine

also miriam is nice she gave me sugar cookies

[infomodder]

not chocolate chip?
if you wanna do deliveries again i can take care of janice
and you can see if miriam gives you her chocolate chip next time
theyre so good
id buy them
she could be a cookie chef

[runningstart]

idc about janice shes fine shes hilarious im just giving u a hard time

[infomodder]

glad youre not scarred for life
but if you want to do deliveries again im not opposed
we could pay you properly for it too

[runningstart]

i kind of already have a job

i cant do them mondays all the time but i can do it on weekends

[infomodder]

weekends would be great
how do you kind of have a job?
or is that a hint that you can be persuaded
well get you a nametag with a sticker of a walleye on it as a bonus

[runningstart]

haaaaaa no cannot be persuaded

kind of is because its only part time cause im not 18 but its at starktech so sry not quitting

[infomodder]

[Oh unholy God. Wally is an not only an oddly civic-minded young person, he works for the guy that Will mostly knows as...]

so youre a computer genius
hacker whiz kid
crack codes
matthew broderick in wargames makes you roll your eyes
and all that?

[It's always the peppy ones who have some fondness for giving back (or simply don't want to feel indebted, perhaps) to watch out for.

Oh God.

Wally probably knows Will's fallen into Bejeweled Blitz Hell a time or two because computer geniuses in Heropa get fancy computer powers oh God he's seen the texts to April oh God what about the texts to Chilton OH GOD EVERYTHING IS RUINED THIS NEWFANGLED GENERATION IS GOING TO CAUSE AN ECONOMIC BREAKDOWN AND GLOBAL WARMING AND REMAKE ALL THE LAND BEFORE TIME MOVIES WHY MUST PEOPLE SUCCESSFULLY PROCREATE]

[runningstart]

[rest your gentle heart, will] nah dude chemistry

particle physics too but im officially in the chem dept

also war games is awesome

[infomodder]

[SER MORMONT I DO NOT HAVE A GENTLE HEART]

so scientific genius instead

[Look, Skye was all pumped up about working for Stark and she was fantastic at her computer mumbo jumbo emojis and viruses, so clearly Tony Stark just hires geniuses of some sort, right????]

really?
i havent seen it since it first came out

[40,000,000 years ago in 1983.]