IC contact [Mask or Menace]

[infomodder]

"Gone fishing."

[ so don't leave messages to ruin the after fishing glow !!!

your one stop shop for not leaving him alone ]

Comments

[redhairring]

I guess so? I don't know for sure.
nooo
your gf is Bader

[infomodder]

no
my roommate who i initially moved to virginia with
is Bader
my girlfriend who i spend weekends in heropa for
is April
that's a reality i've never questioned so you can quit trying to insist otherwise

[redhairring]

isn't April like 16?
cradle robber

[ have crushes on people who are actually your age (or probably older in Freddie's case) GOSH. ]

[infomodder]

No. She is not "like 16"
She is 24.

[And Will is 38 and if he only knew about Zeller he would be capable of slinging that in her face. Alas.]

[redhairring]

Oh my god
you could be her dad.
At least with the guys I'm trying to flirt with, none of them are old enough to be my dad.

1/3

[infomodder]

i would not have been a father at 14
just because you can biologically be a parent doesn't mean it would happen
need a partner for that

[read: i was as sad and lonely as a teenager as i was when you met me :)]

2/3

[infomodder]

it's not something you really ask people on the network anyway
have you seen anyone randomly putting an a/s/l in their conversations
i haven't
not acceptable
and we talked through text for the most part at first

[infomodder]

if i was real fbi maybe i'd have done a background check first
but
i'm not and i don't care to

[redhairring]

tl;dr I didn't realize she was a baby until we started flirting and won't admit that I fucked up

[infomodder]

if this is REALLY SUCH A FUCK UP because of the age gap
i want to change all my fuck ups to be more like this
everyone should get the chance to fuck up like this
as opposed to
you know
my usual fuck ups
that i'm sure you wrote about

[redhairring]

I haven't called you a psychopath in months
allow me this little bit of gloating

[infomodder]

remind me to teach you how to physically shoot yourself in the foot
we had to do it in training when i was a cop
take pepper spray in the eyes, get tased, shoot ourselves in the foot
to know what it was like on the receiving end
part of the process
no need to look it up
you can trust me
i was a cop
wear flip flops don't want pieces of your heels getting stuck in the wound

[redhairring]

blah blah blah
i'll stop making fun of you and your jailbait girlfriend
does that make you happy?

[infomodder]

what kind of question is that
don't ask me questions like that

[One that most people can give a straightforward answer to but Will Graham is just thinking of therapy and people trying to get in his head and, as such, no answer.]

you probably shouldn't make fun of April
she's in Ace's house
(one of the files you leaked)
and one of her powers is actually rather frightening
btw do you have an "alias" here

[Smooth like frozen butter in brick form.]

[redhairring]

yeah, when the porter asked for one I said "tattlecrime"

[ obviousness: thy name is Freddie ]

does it matter?

[infomodder]

[It's okay, his isn't much better.]

yeah
thinking if people won't shut up about how much you fucked them over
i lost my job because of freddie lounds
freddie lounds is an evil person with no heart
bullshit that's been all over lately
someone should be able to release your file
satiate the hypocritical frothing masses if they look closer to biting
and
that was the missing piece
thanks

[redhairring]

there's not much of interest in my file
I'd be fine with them releasing it

[ sure, it would be confirmation of that one power she's trying to hide from everybody as well as releasing the knowledge that she and Jayden live together...but at the same time, it would be releasing the knowledge that they live with a MOTHERFUCKING DINOSAUR. ]

[infomodder]

LOUNDS, FREDDIE [alias: Tattlecrime]
RESIDENCE: Heropa 012 [see: ETC]
POWERS: Turning things to leopard print, murder "sensing" which results in headaches.
MEDICAL HISTORY: Nothing outside the normal. Carries a plague known as "Vegetarianism" (the opposite of contagious)
NOTES: Ran Tattlecrime in her home world, a website dedicated to reporting on murder and murderers, known for having the "first" scoop and gory pictures. Sued for libel multiple times; settled every time. Has perfected the art of getting law enforcement workers unfairly fired. Currently working at not getting killed by superpowered individuals.

[He actually wouldn't ever release the names associated with her that don't stem from Baltimore, but fucking dinosaurs? That's so tempting.]

[redhairring]

GRAHAM, WILL [alias: whatever it is, will look it up later]
RESIDENCE: De Chima 003 [see: ETC] as well as let's be real, you live at the bait shop now
POWERS: Repairing cups.
MEDICAL HISTORY: Has fleas.
NOTES: Known as the FBI's pet psychopath by reputed source Tattlecrime, often brought out onto crime scenes to get into the mind of killers, has terrible choice in psychiatrists.

and it was six times, not multiple. Multiple sounds like it would be something like ten.

[infomodder]

[There's a moment's pause before he shoots off:]

GRAHAM, WILL [alias: Wolf Trap]

[Just that. But then the one that follows, oh. Oh, terrible choice in psychiatrists and they do rub off on him, don't they?]

I can tally up how many people asked for your file
and use that as justification
or if the heat gets bad enough
we could pull this off
we could do this

[Saul ain't got shit on the horrifying trainwreck that is getting these two together and, seemingly, at each other's throats.

Unless he's doing divorce court, then maybe.]

[redhairring]

glad to know we're both equally unimaginative in our choices of names.

[ but they could seriously pull this off. Freddie vs. Will, just like old times. ]

does chasing off somebody who was creeping under your windowsill count as bad enough?
also, some kids keyed my car but joke's on them, the thing's a pice of shit anyway [ it's just now a piece of shit with a dick on it. ]

[infomodder]

the lack of imagination might work in our favor more than against it

[Because they're personal in a materialistic way and, to an outsider, pretty Goddamn boring. Who hides behind the name of their website, the name of their town? Boring people from a boring world that nobody needs to pay too much mind to? He can already hear replies to the idea of Freddie's, and it saddens him that the voice of reason he's seeking among them ends up belonging to a teenage girl who is a sponge with a spine and a damn fine brain.

Hrm.]

that does count as pretty bad. you're not the only person living in that house. if people are going to complain about getting shit on while targeting you at a shared house, they're not doing a very good job of proving themselves the better person here. that's just bad heroism.
put up a sign about the dinosaur? i've thought about breaking into your place once or twice
but there's a goddamn dinosaur
put one on your car too
who wants to piss off a dinosaur??

[If the sign doesn't put them off, she can always offer them an alcoholic beverage with a tablet crushed into it. No one will figure it out!]

[redhairring]

you know, at times like this I am so thankful for that goddamn dinosaur
even if he keeps calling me a mammal

[ and ngl, literally like 50% of the reason why Freddie's so confident that nobody will kill her/fuck her shit up is because she lives with a dinosaur, do you want to mess with that? even if the dinosaur probably wouldn't do anything. and wouldn't listen to her in the first place. it's still a dinosaur. ]

i'm sure I can find some arts major to make me a beware of dinosaur sign.

[infomodder]

if you have them do the font in comic sans i hear it'll really help repel people

[From Skye. He's not saying that much, though. Nope.]

i'm going to have to clue Abigail in on this so she doesn't butt in thinking we're being sincere
and come up with something to go before and after
does "i'm open to further questions but if you ask a question i have answered twice already in public view you are getting ignored" sound approachable

[No. No it does not. He knows. He does admire Freddie's ability to deal with so many people, truly. She ruins lives and makes a living off ruining the memories of the murdered and yet she can still talk to people with more grace than him?

Or maybe she just likes talking (the sound of her voice or socialization in general?) more than he does, which is it.]

[redhairring]

if you're cluing in Abigail, then I'm cluing in Jayden. [ because she has absolutely no faith in his dumb decisions and doesn't want to explain the whole 'here's why Aunt Freddie and Uncle Will are fighting despite the fact that Aunt Freddie trusts Uncle Will enough to totally drug her kid.'

the rest of Baltimore crew could think whatever the hell they wanted. it's not like Freddie & Will fighting is a NEW development. ]

and that last statement sounds like you're forced into doing it. you could stand to be a bit nicer.