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Question. How does one go about finding the perfect Christmas tree? What is the criteria that makes it a good tree?

Is Frederick opposed to Christmas trees?

[ omg, Will. how do u christmas. Raina doesn't have a clue. ]

You have to think about one thing, primarily, when selecting a Christmas tree: space. How much do you have to spare? How much space do you want it to take up? A simple formula for that would be: Room height (let's say your ceilings are 8 feet for this) minus a tree topper if you want one (so put 8 inches here at least, whatever you're using) minus how much height is put on by the stand (usually about a half foot) minus any table/base you may put under the stand (if you use one, let's say 4 inches) plus the removed bottom of the tree (also about a half foot). That equals how tall the tree you purchase must be to fit where you need it, if you're doing a full-sized one. So: 8 feet - 8 inches - 6 inches - 4 inches + 6 inches = a tree of 6.8 feet would be a tight fit but right in your target range. I assume due to your affinity for plants, you are buying a real tree instead of artificial. You'll want to check it for it freshness. I assume you know a good plant from a poor one. Aside from the usual, I'd advise checking for any sign of insect life. You don't want to unknowingly welcome an infestation! If you don't want to buy a tree but harvest it yourself, I wouldn't be opposed to helping you out there. Don't get to chop much wood for the fire place in a warm winter. Frederick shouldn't be opposed to a tree at all.

[TAKE HIS HAND THEY'LL MAKE IT HE SWEARS OH OH LIVING ON A CHRISTMAS PRAYER]

Oh! Would you? Help, that is? I'd like to surprise him with one when he comes home from work tomorrow. Since he's not opposed to them. And cutting one of our own would be nice.

Do you know of any habits he has around Christmas time? Seasonal things he likes to do? Maybe things his other girlfriends did for him that I can do better?

Certainly. We could make an afternoon of it, if you wanted. Grab an early supper, come up with what we're going to make for Christmas, find the perfect tree.

[He's just assuming Chilton told her their plot. Their plan. Their scheme for Adult Christmas.]

Unfortunately, I can't be of any help there. I know he likes orchids. White hydrangeas, he brought me some when he visited in the hospital. Maybe he thought I'd like them, though, and doesn't care either way. As for other girlfriends

[Well.

Where's the harm?]

one of them injected him with tracking devices and the other threw him into the Atlantic ocean. Keep it a holiday season without overly possessive gestures or violence and you're bound to keep your spot on the number one throne.

I'd like that. My schedule is flexible, so I can free up the day for you. Frederick is usually occupied until later in the evening on Fridays, so it would be perfect.

But good lord. He certainly has a way with women, doesn't he?

Still -- you were his friend back home. You mean to tell me you didn't get him a Christmas gift or attend silly holiday parties at the office? You two didn't make small talk about what you would do over Christmas? He didn't ask you for tree advice? Because you're quite clearly an expert at it. ;)

Meet at your place at 3? Somewhere else? Another time? We weren't friends like that, no. Partially my fault. When I retired, I left Baltimore behind. Didn't want to think about that any more. Cut ties to keep it that way. No hard feelings to him, I just didn't want to be reminded of it. Couldn't really start a new life if I didn't. And I don't think he had any girlfriends in Baltimore.

3 works perfectly for me.

And regardless of whether he had girlfriends in Baltimore or not, every girl he dated has been leading up to me. There won't ever be another woman to match what I am to him. Of that, I'm confident.

[ Hey. So what if she's a little arrogant? So's Chilton. They're both the most insecure, overconfident people you'll ever meet. ]

But it seemed as though despite your best efforts, you could never fully escape. Not until now. Til death do you part, as is the saying. But at least now you have an opportunity to get him a Christmas gift or go to the silly holiday parties at Frederick's office.

You don't need to remind me. I've already got his gifts wrapped up and ready to go.

[...]

Yours too.

[merry christmas c:]

[ Oh. That takes her by surprise. Hopefully it's not fleas. ]

You got me a gift? Why?

[It would be crabs before fleas.]

Because you're part of the family and I like you.

[ Aw, shucks, Will. ]

This world sure is something, isn't it? I spent my whole life without a family back home and in only a few short months here, I have a place to belong.

I would say you've already given me the greatest of gifts.

I know how you feel. This world isn't anywhere near as bad as some peoplethink it is. Too late. Your other gifts cannot be returned.

Gifts? Now it's plural? Will, you don't have to spoil me.

[ Yes, you do. Keep the presents coming. ]

But I've never had a single complaint concerning this world. And I would say, it makes for a fine afterlife.

[Look, he knows how to deal with people who like classy things. And maybe if he plays his cards right he'll get to see the monster she keeps for reasons other than her feeling the need to unleash it on him. If she's appeased, sated, content.]

It's not spoiling! It's Christmas. We're in full agreement on that. Better than any sort of heaven or hell I've ever read about.

What is it like? Facing your own death? I imagine the dread of it is worse than the actual event itself.

Might depend on how you go. Mine was bloody, cold, and wet, but it was on my terms. I was ready. Embraced what I was doing and what would happen after. Nothing has been more freeing. I have no questions about what might be happening back home, I have no reason to want to go back for anything. Don't think about it that much, either. It's freedom, to me. Facing my death. That's why I talked about it in public.

I am understandably afraid.

But the unique thing about this world is that we have people who have gone through similar situations. And when I look at you and yours, I'm glad you got to die on your own terms. And it makes me hopeful after seeing your happiness with your wife and family, that I, too, will have that happiness with Frederick long after my death.

I don't usually inspire hope in others.

[Pity, worry, disgust, anger, occasionally terror. Hannibal had plenty of hope when he looked at Will but...that was Hannibal. That was Different.]

I'll try to make sure you don't have a reason not to find life here hopeful. [Welcome to the pack but also, yeah, he doesn't wanna screw things up with April.] We can talk about it more when we get your tree if you want.

Sounds good. Thank you, Will. I'll see you Friday. :)

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